When I find myself in a conversation with someone who is feeling hopeless about a particular situation in his or her life, I am always open to listen. I don't like to give advice so much as my experiences and what has worked for me may not be in the next person's favor or interest. However, I do like to reassure that even though in this particular moment things seem doubtful, it is only temporary. It makes me feel better knowing that I am not alone in my feelings whenever I reach out for comfort, so I try my best to make others feel the same way. Sometimes, all a person needs is to have a safe place to vent without judgement or suggestions. We try so many things in order to have a more normal life that at times, we don't really want to hear about another drug to try. Personally, unless asked about it, I don't talk about a new drug, therapy, etc. to others.
If I am feeling like my hope reserves are being depleted, it is most likely due to being frustrated with the current status of my migraines. When I am über frustrated, I don't want to talk about my neurologist or lack of treatment options because it only makes me feel worse. I know all too well my situation and what I really want is to not think about it. It is already a constant reminder to me every day being that my head hurts every day. What I do want is compassion, understanding, and acceptance because I am doing my best to do everything possible to treat my disease. So I approach others in the same fashion because I know that they too are doing everything in their power to feel better.
All it takes is to say, "I completely understand" or "I know exactly how you feel". Those are phrases that I say often because I do know and understand. It is important to me to convey that I am compassionate and willing to listen. If I am asked what keeps me hopeful or moving forward, I always say that the little things in my life remind me that there is always something worth living for. For example, my children, a roof over my head, clean clothes, food to eat, water to drink, transportation, a source of income, etc. What we tend to take for granted in life actually keeps me grounded these days. I am fortunate to have these things. If I lacked any of these, dealing with my disease would be much more burdensome and harder to manage. Whatever it is in your life that helps you feel better, look to those things as your reminder to stay hopeful. Whether it is family, friends, fur babies, or hobbies they are all important pieces of your life. Everyone has a hope circle surrounding them. The little things make up that circle. Every day we have our own little hope circles with us. Sometimes we forget that they are there and need a little reminder of their existence.
The Migraine and Headache Awareness Month Blog Challenge is organized by the American Headache and Migraine Association.
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